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READ KINDLE ó England, England õ Jerry Batson, Qui Se D Finit Comme Un Accoucheur D Id Es , Va En Vendre Une Assez Sensationnelle Sir Jack Pitman, Un Excentrique Milliardaire Cr Er Sur L Le De Wight Une Sorte De Gigantesque Parc D Attractions Rassemblant Tout Ce Qu Il Y A De Plus Typique, De Plus Connu En Angleterre Cela Va Des Blanches Falaises De Douvres Manchester United, De Buckingham Palace Stonehenge, Du Mausol E De La Princesse Diana Au Th Tre De ShakespeareLe Projet Est Monstrueux, Hautement Risqu , Et Voil Qu Il Se R V Le Tre Un Norme Succ S La Copie Va T Elle Surpasser L Original Et Qu Adviendra T Il Si C Est Elle Que Les Touristes Pr F Rent Visiter F Rocement Dr Le, Dr Lement Impitoyable, Impitoyablement Au Vitriol, Voil Un Portrait De L Angleterre Comme On N En Avait Encore Jamais Vu I ran out of books to read at home, so I went to my college stack in hopes of finding something interesting This book was given to me by a professor during office hours I don t remember who it was, or why she decided that I would enjoy it, but I ended up not reading it and apparently not returning it My bad.The premise of this novel is strange It centers around a powerful businessman s idea to create an ideal England on an island as a tourist attraction, showcasing all the hallmarks of typical England but without the blemishes of modern culture Caught in the mix is Martha Cochrane, a middle aged woman who feels left behind in life.The book itself is very high culture and self referential, often stopping to make long, philosophical treatises on art, imitation, and authenticity However, I felt like these expositions were in charge, relegating any notions of plot to the background The majority of the novel is a series of conversations about the island and characters opinions and interpretations of it Aside from one extremely out of place and vulgar scene, the book reads like a very highfalutin joke that I did not have the patience or sophistication to comprehend or enjoy While I did enjoy Sir Jack s larger than life trollish behavior, it wasn t enough to keep me interested in reading The novel is barely 280 pages long and it took me about two weeks to get through it What was it that I said during those office hours that inspired such a recommendation As much as I love Julian Barnes, I am divided about England, England On the one hand, it illustrates in a satirical and sad way why England has such trouble finding its place in the world right now Julian Barnes undoubtedly has the intelligence and skill to write a poignant satire on the state of Englishness But maybe my timing is not the best I found myself constantly thinking that it is not funny any, that it is too much to bear Maybe Julian Barnes, in 1998, understood and captured the feeling of the future England 2016 and conserved it for me to suffer through at this moment in time.I read it in a couple of hours, devouring it, waiting for hope to appear and give me a glimpse of a better future But there is nothing but a replica of what we have already seen a million times to be expected, of the same, but condensed to a fun park experience and lived through in fast forward You choose what sad ingredients of English life you want to consume, and Julian Barnes with all his genius is one of the many options you have He can not help making the list of the quintessentially English, and neither can he help joking about it After all, he is English, as one of his characters conveniently states in defence of all his opinions.It is a very readable book, and very true in all its sarcastic absurdities It just made a sad and hopeless impression, and I find it hard to apply the dry sense of humour of its content to the review Too serious a feeling of irrevocable loss This is the first work by Barnes I ve given less than 4 stars, though I thought the first section detailing Martha s childhood and formation of character was great Then the book went downhill for me, as another character, Sir Jack, took center stage in the second, and longest, section I have no problem at all with unlikable characters I don t need to like a character to enjoy a work , but so many times when readers say they dislike books because there are no likable characters, I wonder if what they might really mean is that the characters are boring, which is how I found Sir Jack I understand he is part of the satirical, farcical nature of this section, but that didn t stop him from boring me, as did some of the rather long passages that lay out the progression of the Isle of Wight s becoming England, England Unfortunately , the third section was also marred by some of that same kind of description, as what happened on the mainland while the Island project was growing takes over I did like the ending better than the middle because of its metaphors, which stopped me from giving this two stars. Okay, let me start by saying that Julian Barnes is obviously very intelligent He is witty and intelligent and well read BUT this book is obnoxious It s not the worst book I ve ever read by any is smart and funny in parts and he has a point but the language is pretentious and showy You have to have an English degree to get through this book which I am in the process of obtaining Overall, it is inaccessible So if his point is that we prefer simulacra over the original and society has become complacent, lazy, etc., with this novel, he is only preaching to people who agree with him because only people who would probably agree with him would take the time to try to understand this novel Additionally, it was boring I fell asleep at least 5 times while trying to get through this book That has never happened to me before with any other book ever Congratulations, Julian Barnes, you re brilliant but the ironies and the parodies would only reach the highly educated and the book doesn t make me feel anything at all.